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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26484361">growing pains</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/consistently_inconsistent/pseuds/consistently_inconsistent'>consistently_inconsistent</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>ENHYPEN (Band), I-LAND (Korea TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Character Study, Introspection, Jay is all knowing, Kinda, Lee Heeseung is Whipped, Lee Heeseung is a Panicked Gay, Light Angst, M/M, POV Multiple, Park Jong Seong | Jay is a Little Shit, Pining, Possibly Unrequited Love, Pretty Park Sunghoon, Short, Short Chapters, Short One Shot, and ni-ki is an angsty teen, cos it's what Jay deserves, each chappie is in a dif perspective eek, i think???, im sorry im a mess fuCk, jake is the sofest boy ever, jungwon and jay are done and tired, just pining, lee heeseung is bad at feelings, like v v short, ni-ki baby im so sorry, no beta we die like women, oh and again like how pretty he is, sunoo is a sweetheart, that's all it is, this whole fic is heeseung calling sunghoon pretty like, this whole thing is just an excuse for me to talk about how much i love park sunghoon, trying to make this an official tag</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 10:48:01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,434</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26484361</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/consistently_inconsistent/pseuds/consistently_inconsistent</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Heeseung's pretty sure Jungwon knows (he doesn't know if this is because of his own transparency or because Jay can't keep his thoughts to himself, but either way, Jungwon probably knows) - and Heeseung can avoid Jay, but he can't avoid Jungwon, for reasons that include 1) Jungwon can beat Heeseung's ass, and 2) Jungwon cries, and Heeseung can't deal with either of those thoughts without breaking into a cold sweat. Either way, Jungwon knows, and Heeseung's pretty sure Sunoo's catching on too, given this is exactly the sort of thing Sunoo lives and breathes for. And if Jay, Jungwon and Sunoo all know, then Jake and Ni-ki probably know too, and if Jake knows there's no way Sunghoon hasn't found out yet and-</p><p>Okay. Deep breaths, Heeseung, deep breaths.</p><p>Everything is fine. Sunghoon has no idea. </p><p>No one knows anything at all.</p><p>;</p><p>Heeseung and Sunghoon are in love, everyone knows, and they are worse for knowing it. Jay is going to scream, Jungwon is going to lock them in a closet, Sunoo doesn't know how many more rom-coms he can satiate himself with, Jake is too nice to do anything, Ni-ki just wants to know what the fuck is going on, and Sunghoon and Heeseung, well, yeah.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lee Heeseung/Park Sunghoon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>102</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>273</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. heeseung</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>i wrote this in 3 hours in between schoolwork breaks, so this is really messy and I basically go all over the place with hee's emotions but like, isn't that how emotions function anyway??</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">Things are different now, that much is evident.</p><p class="p1">Heeseung can't remember the how much time had passed since he'd last spent an extended amount of time without a camera hovering nearby - save for Sunoo at least, and his phone, and his constant picture-taking. Regardless, Heeseung didn't think living in actual privacy again would be difficult, but here he is, checking to see if a camera is nearby when he changes his clothes or gets out of the shower. He's just been living under surveillance for so long now; more than a hundred days. More than a hundred days of control, regarding anything and everything that could be viewed as mildly embarrassing or offensive. More than a hundred days of checking himself of every gesture, action or look he gave. More than a hundred days of absolute restraint.</p><p class="p1">Here's another thing - Park Sunghoon is pretty.</p><p class="p1">This is a fact. A common notion that everyone must accept and/or agree with - to the extent where even Jay, who refuses to admit Sunghoon is attractive out loud when the boy is anywhere in his vicinity, has confessed to Heeseung late at night that yes, Sunghoon is not entirely unfortunate looking, in fact, he really is quite beautiful, and no Heeseung is not blind. It just is, completely and unequivocally, a truth. The earth revolves around the sun, everything is made of atoms, Park Sunghoon is pretty.</p><p class="p1">And Heeseung? Well, Heeseung is a boy in deep, deep trouble.</p><p class="p1">He should be used to this by now, Sunghoon and Heeseung have known each other for well over 2 years, have hung out together innumerable times, and have fucking <em>lived</em> together for the past 3 months, often sharing a room. Heeseung should really be used to the boy's presence, and not get lost in his eyes or drunk on his laughter, not after all this fucking time. Unfortunately, Heeseung just <em>isn't</em>. He wasn't used to it the first time he met Sunghoon at the Bighit practice room, he wasn't used to it when they entered I-LAND together, he wasn't used to it throughout the entirety of the show, and apparently he's nowhere close to used to it now.</p><p class="p1">At least things are better now than they were on the show, granted it hasn't really been all that long. Nevertheless, it <em>is</em> better - on the show Heeseung, again, had to show restraint. So a glance too long or a look too wistful were both not options, as well as things he had to be constantly aware of. He'd still slipped, he knew that, he's seen the "seungsung" compilations on youtube - Sunoo's lurking habits have definitely passed on to him in ways that are entirely unhealthy because, <em>fuck</em>, Heeseung looks so fucking whipped in those videos. What's worse is that the way they're framed has Sunghoon looking whipped right back, and that is not a path Heeseung is going to let himself walk down on.</p><p class="p1">Nevertheless, here Heeseung is.</p><p class="p1">The earth still revolves around the sun, everything is still made of atoms, and even though the show is over, Park Sunghoon is still pretty.</p><p class="p1">And, Heeseung is still a boy in deep, deep trouble.</p><p class="p1">The fact of it is that it all runs deeper than Sunghoon's aesthetic charm. It would be much, much easier if Sunghoon was <em>just </em>pretty - unfortunately, he's more than that. He's an inexplicable dichotomy of quiet shyness and loud laughter, of insecurity and optimism, of thorough introversion and deep connections with almost all the people he does get to know, of screaming while playing VR one second, and then gliding faultlessly on the ice the next, of purely cold beauty and the warmest smile Heeseung has ever laid eyes on. And yes he's pretty, deeply, deeply so, but he's also intelligent and understanding, and while it may take a few days to come through, just inexplicably loving, all in ways Heeseung has yet to fully wrap his mind around.</p><p class="p1">Heeseung himself is a fairly straight forward person, he's a nice guy, a little shy at first, but ultimately social and funny. Your typical funny, leader types (as opposed to your not-typical funny leader types like, say, Jay). Sunghoon, however, is anything but straight forward - and as a result, Heeseung's feelings for the younger boy are equally muddled. They're not confused, just, chaotic in a way, and they spread through Heeseung's body like tendrils, electric at his fingertips and sweaty at his palms and cold at his feets, hot and raging in his ears, soft and fluttery in his belly, unsteady and grasping at his feet.</p><p class="p1">For the third time: <em>trouble</em> - Heeseung is in <em>trouble</em>.</p><p class="p1">They're off the show now, not constantly under the view of cameras and tv-editors, but Heeseung still finds himself forcibly tearing his eyes away from Sunghoon after he feels like he's been staring for a second too long, or pull his hands away from around the younger's shoulders after a touch that may have been firmer than it had to have been. He always prays Sunghoon hasn't noticed afterwards, and if he has the younger has yet to say anything It all boils down to one thing: a couple of fan theories and an Mnet Editor suspecting something are one thing, but Sunghoon himself being aware of Heeseung's pathetic jumble of emotions is another thing altogether, and Heeseung thinks he may literally self combust if he were to know. </p><p class="p1">It gets worse still, because Jay, by some cruel twist of fate <em>knows</em>.</p><p class="p1">And has known since the very start of the show.</p><p class="p1">Jay's smart enough to not say anything, knowing that their mics are strapped onto them at all times and that this is news far too sensitive for the prying eyes of whichever Mnet editor goes over their footage, but his looks are enough to tell Heeseung that Jay knows, full and well. And this, unlike other things regarding the differences between normal life and life on the show, gets infinitely harder now that that they aren't being filmed anymore. Jay is no longer cautious with his looks or his words or his raised eyebrows aimed at Heeseung everytime him and Sunghoon are so much as next to each other. They've only been living together in the dorm for a few weeks but Jay is already insufferable when it comes to this (they have yet to discuss it fully though - thankfully - granted Jay had opened several conversations with the words "So, Sunghoon-ie huh?" and Heeseung had bolted out of there as quickly as he could).</p><p class="p1">There's more still, because Heeseung's pretty sure Jungwon knows too (he doesn't know if this is because of his own transparency or because Jay can't keep his thoughts to himself, but either way, Jungwon probably knows) - and Heeseung can avoid Jay, but he can't avoid Jungwon, for reasons that include 1) Jungwon can beat Heeseung's ass, and 2) Jungwon cries, and Heeseung can't deal with either of those thoughts without breaking into a cold sweat. Either way, Jungwon knows, and Heeseung's pretty sure Sunoo's catching on too, given this is exactly the sort of thing Sunoo lives and breathes for. And you know what, if Jay, Jungwon and Sunoo all know, then Jake and Ni-ki probably know too, and if Jake knows there's no way Sunghoon hasn't found out yet and-</p><p class="p1">Okay. He's overthinking now.</p><p class="p1">Deep breaths, Heeseung, deep breaths.</p><p class="p1">Everything is fine. Sunghoon has no idea.</p><p class="p1">As things stand, Heeseung is simply trying his best. To not stare too hard, to not touch too much, to not get too close, to not fall too deep - at least not fall any deeper than he already has. Restraint is the key word here, restraint that runs far far deeper than not doing something embarrassing on I-LAND, like spilling his food or tripping over himself. Oh, and also, Park Sunghoon is pretty. Stunning. Beautiful even. And Heeseung has no idea what to do with the dreadful realisation that that prettiness runs much, much deeper than most would think.</p><p class="p1">So yeah, Heeseung is a boy in deep, <em>deep</em>, trouble.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. sunghoon</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Sunghoon is many things, but he likes to think that he isn't an idiot.</p><p>He's seen the looks that look away too soon, and the touches that pull away before they need to. The smiles. The grabs. They're not really all that subtle.</p><p>Unfortunately, Sunghoon is also careful to a fault.</p><p>So even the smallest possibility of all of this being a result of Heeseung's overly friendly nature has Sunghoon shoving any and all of his observations to the deepest depths of his mind, and locking them away before his hopes spread through his body and implant themselves firmly in his heart.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Fact number one about Park Sunghoon: the one thing he's most afraid of is falling.</p><p>Fact number two about Park Sunghoon: when Sunghoon was 8 years old, he basically had his life figured out.</p><p>He was already 2 years into figure skating - and frankly, doing very well. The plan was as follows: junior champion by age 12, under 18 champion not too long after that, and then the Olympics by the time he was 18. He was on track too, since by age 16 Sunghoon ranked number 7 out of <em>all</em> the male figure skaters in Korea, and placed consistently in the top 3 in the under 18 category - everything was going perfectly and precisely, according to plan. Not just any plan either, <em>his</em> plan. The plan he'd been working on for almost all his life. Everything was going perfectly, precisely, according to <em>his</em> very own plan, and <em>his</em> goal, and <em>his</em> dream. </p><p>Until it wasn't.</p><p>Now here Sunghoon is, sitting in a dorm he shares with 6 other people, preparing to be an <em>idol</em> of all things.</p><p>The Sunghoon from a few years ago would laugh at him, call him a coward, say he took the easy way out. This isn't true, Sunghoon knows this now, being an idol is <em>just </em>as hard as being a figure skater if not harder - but he didn't know this a few years ago. There's still a lingering guilt in his system, it calls him weak and selfish and an array of other things Sunghoon tries his best not to think too much about. Sunghoon also remembers his mom's face the day he'd told her that he wanted to stop skating, a scattered, utterly heart wrenching look of hurt mixed with fear and, most scary of all, betrayal. This was Sunghoon giving up on a dream they'd crafted together, a life-long mission, a journey they were supposed to finish together just as they'd started it together.</p><p>Sunghoon's mother had cried that day.</p><p>He had too. And for a few nights that followed.</p><p>It's a strange feeling, falling out of love with something, it teaches Sunghoon that his fear of falling may not be purely literal. Nevertheless, here Sunghoon is. He's made it through I-LAND, ended up on the other side of all of it - he's an <em>idol</em>, well, almost an idol, one who already has hundreds of thousands of fans and a group of members that he adores. Nevertheless, it feels unreal sometimes, like a dream Sunghoon has crafted up - and not always in the best way. He's always been a perfectionist, originally just by nature, but those tendencies have grown and intensified over years of gliding on ice and missing and hitting axels and lutzes and jumps to the best of his capabilities.</p><p>And the self deprecation rears it's face in Sunghoon's mind sometimes, more often than it should if he's honest, taunting him. He knows he's attractive, people have always told him that he's pretty and especially after he became a trainee - that's where the easy-route narrative shows up in Sunghoon's mind, taunting him, saying he's only here because he's got a face a couple strangers with cable connection and a few odd industry professionals like. No one cares if you're pretty when you're an athlete, it was always a reassurance then because Sunghoon knew his accomplishments were genuine, he got his medals and his titles because of his skating, and only that.</p><p>Things are different, however, in the idol world. Sunghoon has been thrown into a group and branded a visual, as if that's his role, something to look at more than something to watch, an ornament to make something a little prettier, and only that. And Sunghoon often finds himself looking around at this group of boys he's come to respect, admire and even love <em>so</em> much, and wonder what exactly he has to offer aside from long eyelashes and full lips and pale skin.</p><p>He's always been an overthinker.</p><p>He's lucky though, because those thoughts are easy to will away, even if just for a moment. He's been lucky with his group members, in that he truly adores each and every one of them -regardless of how much he bickers Jay or Sunoo. Because it's all in good nature really, and when he does so, and he feels better. He cuddles with Jungwon, and he feels better. He practices with Ni-ki, and he feels better. He talks to Jake, and he feels better. He simply shares a smile with Heeseung, a quick burst of eye contact, a brush of fingertips, and well, he feels better, but this is a whole other can to open up.</p><p>See Sunghoon is many things, but he likes to think that he isn't an idiot.</p><p>He's seen the looks that look away too soon, and the touches that pull away before they need to. The smiles. The stares. They're not really all that subtle. Unfortunately, Sunghoon is also careful to a fault, a lifetime of a single misstep being possibly career ending will do that to you, so even the smallest possibility of all of this being a result of Heeseung's overly friendly nature has Sunghoon shoving any and all of his observations to the deepest depths of his mind, and locking them away before his hopes spread through his body and implant themselves firmly in his heart. Because Sunghoon has never relied on hope, and he doesn't want to start now.</p><p>Perseverance and practice, Sunghoon has lived his whole life on those two things.</p><p>Unfortunately, you can't persevere and practice your way into being loved.</p><p>Heeseung is everything Sunghoon isn't. Bright, powerful, his mere presence has people staring and watching and keeping an eye out, looking for what this kid has to offer because just one glance tells you that it's a lot. Heeseung is a guiding force no matter where he goes, drawing people along behind him - and Sunghoon is one of those people, following the older boy blindly, giving in and letting himself being overtaken by his radiance, by the blinding light that is Lee Heeseung.</p><p>Falling in love with Lee Heeseung, Sunghoon has also discovered, is just as easy as being impressed by him. Heeseung is a simple person, in all the best ways. Not simple in his talents or his ambition, not at all, but simple in that Sunghoon understands him, for the most part at least - and most others do as well. He's straight forward with his thoughts, funny without even knowing it, brave, kind to a fault, too selfless for his own good, and all of this in ways that align all too perfectly with each other. Sunghoon always knows exactly what Heeseung's going to do, and he also knows he's always going to do the right thing - and Sunghoon knows that no matter what the personal ramifications of this "right thing are", Heeseung will always, <em>always</em>, go through with it.</p><p>Here's the thing, by this logic Sunghoon should be sure that Heeseung does, in fact, harbor the same emotions he does.</p><p>It would make sense, Heeseung has always been easy to read and while Sunghoon can be a little dense from time to time, Heeseung is just completely transparent no matter how hard he tries not to be. And Sunghoon knows their relationship is a little bit special, at least he likes to think so. Heeseung's comments on weverse calling him cute and the way he always focuses every ounce of his attention on Sunghoon when he's talking help push along this narrative - and Sunghoon is more sure than not that Heeseung has feelings for him. He's also more sure than not that Sunghoon has feelings for Heeseung right back, and here's where it gets tricky.</p><p>Because Heeseung is Heeseung, he's all consuming in his brightness, to the point where Sunghoon has to force himself to look away after a while out of fear of being completely blinded by him. Sunghoon doesn't know if this is a side effect of being in, well, whatever it is he is, with Heeseung, or whether this is just what Heeseung is, a ball of fire, high in the sky, direct and bright and everywhere Sunghoon looks. His emotions are a mess, but Sunghoon knows well enough that Heeseung's are doubly so - because Sunghoon knows that Heeseung is straight forward, but <em>he</em> is not. Sunghoon understands Heeseung, but Heeseung looks at Sunghoon, squints, and has no clue whatsoever about the thoughts swimming restlessly in his head. No clue about how deep he's in. No clue about how hard he's fallen.</p><p>And what persists in his mind now is that if falling in love with something is so easy, falling out of love with it may be doubly so. Sunghoon thinks of figure skating, something that had once meant more to him than he could put into words, and then thinks about the slow withering of time, the eventual repetitiveness of performing routines, of listening to classical music, of keeping his back straight and his chest high. If something as dynamic and beautiful and interesting as that can't hold Sunghoon's attention, how in the world is he supposed to hold the attention of the single most incredible man he's ever met.</p><p>Nevertheless, Sunghoon lets himself do something he's never allowed himself to do before: he lets himself <em>hope</em>.</p><p>Hope that maybe, someday, somehow, Sunghoon can fall into Heeseung's arms, and Heeseung can hold him close, and that they can figure out the discord of emotions in their chests and simply exist together, no thrum of gossip or keen eye of camera, no ice, no i-land, just them, and whatever this emotion that festers in Sunghoon's chest whenever they see each other, turns out to be.</p><p>Sunghoon's always been afraid of falling, but here he is, having fallen hard, fast, and deeper than he could've ever imagined.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. sunoo</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Sunghoon definitely has a crush on their hyung.</p><p>And if Sunoo's right - which, not to brag, he usually is - Heeseung has a crush on him right back.</p><p>They're painfully similar in a way, Sunoo notes, in that their both terrifically intimidating in one glance and then almost annoyingly endearing the next - although in very different ways. Heeseung is fire, Sunoo sees him and he's drawn forward like a moth to a flame (appropriately), he wants to hear what the older has to say, wants to warm himself beside him. Sunghoon is different - and as cliché as it is given his past, he is, in fact, ice. Cold and sparkling at first glance, solid and beautiful in a way that has even Sunoo reeling, but soft as snow at a second, cool and ticklish against Sunoo's skin, just the right balance between annoying and affectionate that Sunoo himself pioneers, albeit - again - in a very different way.</p><p>It's that dichotomy between them, Sunoo thinks, that makes them fit so perfectly into the the narratives Sunoo has in his head. Narratives formed after years of rom coms, and chick flicks, and k-dramas and fanfiction (10K words: friends to lovers, slow burn, mutual pining, light angst - the good stuff).</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i sprinkled in a dash of sunki because i wasn't able to help myself, and no im not sorry about it</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sunoo <em>lives</em> for stuff like this.</p><p>He was a sickly kid growing up, as a result he's spent a staggering amount of his childhood and adolescence in bed watching rom-coms with his mom. He's basically seen all of them, every single Meg Ryan movie from When Harry Met Sally to Sleepless in Seattle, every single Molly Ringwald movie from Pretty In Pink to The Breakfast Club, every classic 90s high school rom com, not to mention every goddamn shitty netflix chick flick about white girls and their bad boy love interests. It's becoming a bit of an addiction perhaps - Sunoo watches a Cinderella Story approximately 3 times every single week, he forced Jungwon and Ni-ki to watch it with him a few days ago, he likes to think that they had fun despite how much they complained.</p><p>Because of this, Sunoo is an <em>expert </em>at romance - okay so maybe <em>he's </em>single right now, and maybe it's been a while since he wasn't, but he's still an expert goddamnit! And it is this expertise (as well as, to be fair, the fact that none of his teammates are in any way subtle), that makes Sunoo absolutely, 100% sure that their dear Hyung and Ace Lee Heeseung most definitely has a thing for Park Sunghoon - and well, he <em>knows </em>Sunghoon has a thing right back.</p><p>It all boils down to 3 factors of obviousness. </p><p>Number 1: Jay. Jay is many things. He's funny, he's talented, he's kind, just a great, great guy. What he isn't, however, is subtle. Sunoo isn't sure if Sunghoon's picked up on it yet - more because he knows the older is so deep-rooted into his carefulness that he tends to shove anything suggesting something mildly risqué away, but Jay shoots Heeseung this <em>look</em> everytime him and Sunghoon are so much as sitting next to each other. Sunoo knows what <em>"this look"</em> means. It's that look the best friend shoots the main character when they walk past the love interest in the hallways on the way to math class or band practice, this sorta amused-sorta teasing-sorta curious look, with just a dash of o<em>h-my-god-you're-so-stupid-just-ask-him-out-already</em>.</p><p>Number 2: Heeseung. Heeseung is an open book, he wears his heart and mind and soul on his sleeve. Contrary to popular belief, Sunoo is actually incredibly observant, especially when it comes to a potential romance (again, he could write a PhD on John Hughes movies and also all his friends in high school asked him to set them up, so he really is a <em>pro)</em>. Heeseung obviously loves them all, and he loves them all equally - it's just that the way that he loves Sunghoon is, well, different. He loves Jake and Sunoo the way he loves a little brother. He loves Jay like a best friend. And he loves Ni-ki and Jungwon like one loves their goddamn sons. Sunghoon, however is different - the looks are longing instead of affectionate, and the touches are lingering instead of comfort-seeking. It's a marked difference, and it's obvious because, well, it's Heeseung. Open book and all that jazz.</p><p>Number 3: Sunghoon. Now this is where Sunoo's personal observations and deductive ability come in to play. Sunghoon is not nearly as easy to read as Heeseung or even Jay, in fact he's very very hard to analyse, it's the main reason (among many, to be fair) that Sunoo wanted to get to know him in the first place, to really see what's under that perfect prince-like outwards appearance. Unfortunately for Sunoo, Sunghoon's pretty perfect on the inside as well, but Sunoo's slowly but surely become aware of his (unfortunately, many) insecurities and nervous mannerisms and he's pretty happy to say he knows the guy pretty damn well by now - even if it's only really been a couple of months since they were awkwardly eating lunch beside each other. Anyway, Sunoo knows Sunghoon pretty well by now, and is happy to say  that he can also read him pretty well.</p><p>And also, uh, Sunghoo <em>has</em> told him.</p><p>Well, he hasn't told him, but Sunoo has overheard him telling <em>Jake</em> and then gone ahead and confronted him about it and gotten him to spill the beans with his amazing reasoning skills, so yeah, he basically figured it out all on his own. 100% Sunoo, his detective skills, and his extensive knowledge on romantic comedies. Emphasis on the "extensive" and also the "detective" and also, most importantly, "Sunoo".</p><p>Anyway, yeah, Sunghoon definitely has a crush on their hyung.</p><p>And if Sunoo's right - which, not to brag, he usually is, especially with stuff like this - Heeseung has a crush on him right back.</p><p>They're painfully similar in a way, Sunoo notes, in that their both terrifically intimidating in one glance and then almost annoyingly endearing the next - although in very different ways. Heeseung is fire, Sunoo sees him and he's drawn forward like a moth to a flame (appropriately), he wants to hear what the older has to say, wants to warm himself beside him. Sunghoon is different - and as cliché as it is given his past, he is, in fact, ice. Cold and sparkling at first glance, solid and beautiful in a way that has even Sunoo reeling, but soft as snow at a second, cool and ticklish against Sunoo's skin, just the right balance between annoying and affectionate that Sunoo himself pioneers, albeit - again - in a very different way.</p><p>It's that dichotomy between them, Sunoo thinks, that makes them fit so perfectly into the the narratives Sunoo has in his head. Narratives formed after years of rom coms, and chick flicks, and k-dramas and fanfiction (10K words: friends to lovers, slow burn, mutual pining, light angst - the good stuff). And they pine after each other much in the same way, missed glances and brushed hands - again, Sunoo is observant, none of this gets beyond him, especially when his interest in the subject is so so piqued.</p><p>He likes to think he's known since the started filming I-LAND, right from episode one - you know, Detective Sunoo and all that jazz.</p><p>Unfortunately, Sunoo knows he didn't until halfway through the show. When him and Sunghoon shared a room at camp, and he saw how the older boy always made a point to go say goodnight to Heeseung before they went to bed. And how Heeseung sneaked Sunghoon an extra cup of coffee without the other even getting to know. After the night Sunghoon had told him - grudgingly and accompanied with a lot of nervous and anxiety and also Jake, at the sidelines, looking everywhere between amused and worried and mostly just like the expression one gets when they're about to sigh and say "not again" - Sunoo has been extra observant, looking for more hints, more clues.</p><p>He's probably the only one to have caught on to Sunghoon's feelings before Heeseung's, because Heeseung's are painfully apparent in that even Ni-ki is starting to suspect <em>something</em> granted it isn't necessarily the right <em>something</em> (once, late at night, the youngest had crawled into Sunoo's bunk and whispered under the blanket of night about how "Heeseung-ie Hyung and Sunghoon-ie Hyung aren't fighting right? When we were filming that vlive today Heeseung hyung like got really tense the minute Sunghoon-ie Hyung entered the room." Sunoo had just patted him on the back and cuddled into him wrapping his arms around Ni-ki's torso and attempting to pull him close like some sort of breathing stuffed toy - something which was significantly harder now that Ni-ki was a fair bit taller than him - and had told him not to worry.)</p><p>Sunoo likes to think they'll have a happy ending, they always do in all the movies he consumes - and while Sunoo is rather painfully aware that life, more often than not, doesn't quite pan out the way the movies say it will, and is painfully in touch with the realism that adolescence thrusts upon you (Sunoo is 17, if he's isn't riddled with teen angst now, then when?).</p><p>However, realism falls through when he thinks of what they've all gone through in the past few months.</p><p>In his head, Sunoo knows the show was real, but after watching clips on the internet and whole episodes with his members, it doesn't always feel that. Sunoo's achieved his dream based on no realism and rationality at all. He entered I-LAND physically weak and a fairly new trainee, and in Part 1 he got kicked out each time he got in - according to realism and rationality, him being where he is now, makes little to no sense. And then optimism shines through, and Sunoo is happy that he exists the way he does right now, and fulfilled, and honestly and truly <em>proud</em> of himself.</p><p>As he looks at his hyungs, exchanging sneaky glances and hidden smiles, he hopes what they have can soon exist in the same way.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. jake</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Jake and Sunghoon are very similar people, it's part of the reason they gelled so fast and so well - although part of it, Jake must admit, is his own prodding. Nevertheless, they're at a point wherein Sunghoon's become a rock in Jake's life, a presence he can no longer imagine not being constant - it's just reciprocating which has been difficult.</p><p>Not in thought or sentiment, Jake wants desperately to be as comforting and solid for Sunghoon as Sunghoon is for him, he wants it with all his heart - but in action? This is proving to be near impossible. Sunghoon has walls up, thick, sturdy walls that are locked around him impossibly tight. And while Jake gets a little closer and closer to breaking those walls down every single day - "icon of growth" and "constant improvement" and all that jazz - Sunghoon isn't just a room, he's a fortress, which means that after he breaks down the first set of structures, there's going to be 10 more waiting for him. All in all, it's hard to be there for someone when said someone doesn't give you anything to be there for besides basic moral support and a good hug every now and then.</p><p>An opportunity presents itself in the form of Lee Heeseung.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>jakehoon best friends i said what i said</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Jake was on I-LAND, the term the showrunners coined for him was <em>Icon Of Growth</em>.</p><p>It was a loaded phrase, a little less flattering than <em>Ace</em> of <em>Prince</em>, but a hell of a lot more than<em> Resentment, Anger, Shame.</em> It was also a sort of weird one, framed in a sort of weird way - <em>and </em>it made him sound like some sort of video game character - <em>Jake: The Icon Of Growth.</em></p><p>Well, he'd play that game.</p><p>In any case, Jake likes to think of himself as an "icon of growth" in more ways that one. Sure, he was known on the show as a fast learner, showing constant improvement week after week - he's damn thankful for it too, because he definitely wouldn't have been here if not for that fact. And sure, he's no Lee Heeseung just yet, but he's sure he'll get there one day, he's definitely on track. Hopefully. Maybe. Probably?</p><p>Anyway, speaking of Lee Heeseung, Jake likes to think that his relationships with the rest of the boys in ENHYPEN are also growing steadily. Save for Sunoo, he hasn't known any of these boys for more than 3 or 4 months, and while they're already pretty close to each other honestly - they did all live mere meters away from each other for 3 whole months - as Jake always says (or has been characterized into saying by showrunners and editing and partly his own resolve) there's always room for growth, you know?</p><p>He's relationship with both Jungwon and Ni-ki are warm and sturdy, younger brothers he loves dearly despite the fact that they're both steadily out growing him when it comes to height and reminding him of it every single day. Sunoo, while partly being the bane of Jake's existence, is a sweetheart who Jake loves - an annoying sweetheart, but it doesn't mean Jake loves him any less. Jay is reliable and funny and great and Jake loves playing pranks on him as much as Sunoo loves annoying Jake, they're the same age, they're both from abroad, it's just easy with the two of them. Heeseung is, of course, the epitome of a reliable older brother, and he takes care of all of them like their own family and Jake could not begin to express how thankful he is for it without breaking down into tears. And Sunghoon, well, Sunghoon is basically his best friend at this point. </p><p>Jake's mission upon meeting the boy had been exactly that - <em>I do not care who he is or where he is from, he raised his hand after my performance and now he's going to be my friend whether he likes it or not.</em></p><p>Jake has to admit, it had worked out pretty damn well.</p><p>Jake and Sunghoon are very similar people, it's part of the reason they gelled so fast and so well - although part of it, Jake must admit, is his own prodding. Nevertheless, they're at a point where Jake can sneak into Sunghoon's bed for a friendly little cuddle session whenever he wants, and he knows that Sunghoon going to be a comforting presence for him whenever he needs it. Sunghoon's become a rock in Jake's life, a presence he can no longer imagine not being constant - it's just reciprocating which has been difficult.</p><p>Not in thought or sentiment, Jake wants desperately to be as comforting and solid for Sunghoon as Sunghoon is for him, he wants it with all his heart - but in action? This is proving to be near impossible. Sunghoon has walls up, thick, sturdy walls that are locked around him so tight they could rival the pants Ni-ki had brought with him in the beginning of the show that now barely covered up half of his calves. And while Jake gets a little closer and closer to breaking those walls down every single day - "icon of growth" and "constant improvement" and all that jazz - Sunghoon isn't just a room, he's a fortress, which means that after he breaks down the first set of structures, there's going to be 10 more waiting for him. All in all, it's hard to be there for someone when said someone doesn't give you anything to be there for besides basic moral support and a good hug every now and then.</p><p>An opportunity presents itself in the form of Lee Heeseung.</p><p>Jake can be a little dense, he's really just a soft person, he doesn't try to look in to things that don't warrant looking in to. </p><p>Feelings do not fall into that category - especially when they involve his friends. </p><p>Jake doesn't pick it up right away, the lingering stares, the deep sighs, but after a while it gets kind of hard to ignore. Maybe it's because him and Sunghoon spend so much time together, but the way the younger talks about and looks at Heeseung, and the implications of both of those, slowly creep up on Jake. He wakes up one day, middle of the night, during the training camp Belift sends them on in between part 1 and 2 of I-LAND filming, in sudden realization. Jake walks into the room Sunghoon shares with Sunoo and pulls Sunghoon, half asleep and barely conscious, out into the grounds. Jake remembers Sunghoon blinking at him, still in a sleep-riddled haze, hands rubbing at his face and eyes, puffy with sleep, and rasping out Jake's name, asking him what the fuck was up and why he'd been woken up at god knows when in the morning. Back then, Jake had thought it best to just get out with it, knowing full well that Sunghoon's usual defenses were dulled under layers of sleep.</p><p>
  <em>"Do you like Heeseung Hyung."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I think s- wait what?"</em>
</p><p>And that's all it is to it. Jake resolves that day, in that moment, that <em>this </em>is where he's going to be Sunghoon's pillar - it boils down to many many things:</p>
<ol>
<li>Jake loves Sunghoon like he's loved any of his best friends from the past.</li>
<li>Love is hard - even when it isn't set against the backdrop of an inherently homophobic (and also, somehow, anti relationships in general) industry.</li>
<li>Well, Jake has to be honest, they're pretty damn cute together and Jake is a soft, <em>soft</em>, boy.</li>
</ol><p>Jake has to admit it's gotten a lot easier since they had the initial conversation, at least in terms of Sunghoon opening up about his feelings for their Hyung. Unfortunately, alongside those, Sunghoon also opens up an extra can of insecurities and anxieties and a whole host of things Jake is not aware the younger boy has locked up in his chest. Fortunately, this just give Jake more opportunities to be there for him - and also Jake gives great pep talks and quite literally one of his favorite things in life, there are few things that give him as much unbridled joy as wrapping his friends up in an embrace and whispering into their ears about how <em>yes, you are absolutely, completely, stunningly, talented and lovely and beautiful and kind and brave and fully deserving of Lee Heeseung. Not just 1 Lee Heeseung either, 10 Lee Heeseung's, <strong>all</strong> the Lee Heeseung's </em>- you get the gist. </p><p>(This is just how Jake functions, he sees the good in people, and then reminds them of it - and Sunghoon is <em>so good </em>and Jake loves him <em>so much </em>and he <em>literally just </em>wants to see his best friend happy and not shrinking under the weight of the insecurities piled onto his shoulders.)</p><p>After they have the original conversation (<em>"Do you like Heeseung Hyung." </em><em>"I think s- wait what?"</em>), Jake also starts looking for reciprocity</p><p>He finds that it's stunningly easy to find and then immediately feels stupid for not picking up on it earlier.</p><p>Heeseung is about teen times more obvious that Sunghoon is about his feelings and probably twice as aware of them. Jake doesn't know whether it's because he's really looking for signs now, but they really do seam to be everywhere. Just in the little things, Heeseung complimenting Sunghoon in the morning even through his not-a-morning-person haze, Heeseung's fingers brushing up against Sunghoon's just a little more often that they would with other members, things like that, small, but overwhelmingly present nonetheless. It makes Jake excited, two of his friends are most probably in love with each other - and yeah they're both too stupid to do anything about it but, hey, at least it's a start?</p><p>It gives Jake a sense of fulfillment, to know that after everything Sunghoon has done for him - and their obvious results, given that Jake is standing here, about to fucking <em>debut</em> - this is finally something Jake can do for Sunghoon right back. He thrives on it really, knowing he can (and most definitely will) help someone he loves make their life just a little bit - probably a lot, given the nature of this particular instance - better. Knowing that he can help someone - who's helped him so much along the way, and who Jake is sure will continue to help him in the future - is about as gratifying as knowing he placed 3rd on I-LAND and is going to debut with some of the best people he's ever known in the next few months (<em>yes</em>, that includes Sunoo, <em>and no</em>, he cannot know that).</p><p>Again, Jake is really just dreadfully soft and filled with far, far, <em>far </em>too much love for his friends. </p><p>Luckily, his friends love him right back, and he can still very much get away with sneaking into Sunghoon's bed at night when he really needs to.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>this is probably the chapter im leasts satisfied with and i feel like i didn't quite do jakey justice but well, yes :')</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. jungwon</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Now, Jungwon loves Heeseung like one loves an older sibling. He's great, really. He's smart and talented and funny and, while Jungwon will never admit it to his face, incredibly cool with his beanies and his piercings and his crazy goddamn talent. Jungwon looks up to him almost as much as he does Jungkook from BTS - and that says a heck of a lot. Like, a lot, a lot, a lot. Anyway yeah, don't tell him but Jungwon thinks Heeseung is pretty, goddamn great - unfortunately, Heeseung is also literally the dumbest person  Jungwon has ever met. </p><p>Here's the thing - Jungwon is smart. Jungwon knows Lee Heeseung. Jungwon is smart and knows Heeseung so he also knows that Lee Heeseung is hopelessly crushing on one Park Sunghoon and refuses to do anything about it despite the fact that Park Sunghoon is most definitely crushing right back. Jungwon also knows that Park Sunghoon is aware of  this, but Park Sunghoon is also and idiot who is both dense and stubborn and he also has extra little layer of insecurity, so not only does he too refuses to do anything about it, he also refuses to acknowledge what he knows, full well, is true. </p><p>Jungwon really doesn't know if he should laugh or cry over the situation. </p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>it is 3 a.m and i just finished writing all of this in one chunk but uhhh JUNGWON BEST BOY yes.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jungwon likes to think he's an intelligent kid.</p><p>He always has been too - he does well in school, after all, he's kind of a model student (save for the fact that his chosen life path is that of an idol and the regimented, strict, expensive, boys school he goes to doesn't look at that too kindly. He still tops classes and does about as many extracurriculars as an idol-student can do so fuck that). Jungwon is also modest - and yes he knows saying that is a bit suspicious in itself, but whoever said modesty had to be self-deprecating was wrong and also probably incredibly unhappy in life and, well, Jungwon wasn't going to lie - so out of all the qualities he does have (including, but not limited to, his talent, his cuteness, and of course his impeccable ability to kick people much bigger than him across the face) his intelligence is what he chooses to pride himself most on.</p><p>Jake had once called Jungwon the nations younger brother, and yeah, he gets that. He's not the youngest in the group (he's the <em>second </em>youngest, thank you very much), but he still gets babied probably the most by his Hyungs, and even Ni-ki, who's steadily outgrown him since they both started on I-LAND and now most definitely towers over him in height. Despite the baby-ing, Jungwon is most definitely more mature than most of his members - partly in due to his intelligence, but mostly in due to the fact that, despite how much he loves them, his band mates are kind of idiots.</p><p>They're not stupid, per say, not at all, but they all range from dense to stubborn and well, yeah.</p><p>Heeseung is the worst of them all. He's also both dense and stubborn all at once.</p><p>Now, Jungwon loves Heeseung like one loves an older sibling. Heck, at this point the older practically <em>is</em> Jungwon's big brother - he's an only child so he can't really say for 100% sure, but it most definitely feels that way. Heeseung's great, really. He's smart and talented and funny and, while Jungwon will never admit it to his face, incredibly cool with his beanies and his piercings and his crazy goddamn talent. Jungwon looks up to him almost as much as he does Jungkook from BTS - and that says a heck of a lot. Like, a lot, a lot, <em>a lot</em>. Anyway yeah, don't tell him but Jungwon thinks Heeseung is pretty, goddamn great.</p><p>Unfortunately, Heeseung is also literally the dumbest person  Jungwon has ever met. </p><p>Here's the thing - Jungwon is smart. Jungwon knows Lee Heeseung. Jungwon is smart and knows Heeseung so he also knows that Lee Heeseung is hopelessly crushing on one Park Sunghoon and refuses to do anything about it despite the fact that Park Sunghoon is most definitely hopelessly crushing on him right back. Jungwon also knows that Park Sunghoon is aware of  this, but Park Sunghoon is <em>also </em>and idiot who is both dense and stubborn and he also has extra little layer of insecurity, so not only does he too refuses to do anything about it, he also refuses to acknowledge what he knows, full well, is true. </p><p>It's a conundrum and Jungwon really has no idea what he can do.</p><p>He also doesn't know if it's funny or sad because he could really laugh <em>or</em> cry over the situation. </p><p>All in all, in one Kim Sunoo's words, <em>mess</em>.</p><p>It harder still because at the mere mention of the other boy Heeseung snaps shut like a mousetrap. The older has a soft spot for Jungwon, Jungwon is well aware of that, and usually he uses that to his advantage - getting helpings of Heeseung's secret stash of ramen, or getting to use the older as a living stuffed toy at night because Jungwon doesn't like sleeping alone. But even this doesn't work when it comes to what Jungwon has dubbed The Park Sunghoon Situation™️.</p><p>Him and Jay talk about it a lot, a lot more than they should probably given that it doesn't really involve either of them too much as long as they don't jeopardize the team, but that hasn't stopped them yet and Jungwon can't see it happening anytime soon. They've decided that the two deserve each other, in more ways than one but mostly because they're both amazing people that Jay and Jungwon love and they make each other happy and definitely deserve that happiness.</p><p>(That is, however, easier said than done, because Heeseung has many many walls up and as hard as Jungwon tries breaking them down is proving to be near impossible.)</p><p>(Jungwon hasn't even tried with Sunghoon, because if Heeseung has walls ups Sunghoon also has a alligator infested moat and a fire breathing dragon circling overhead. And despite Jungwon's intelligence, he has no idea how he's going to break these walls down.)</p><p>His little brother tactics aren't working with Heeseung at all - which is a first given that Heeseung is one weak motherfucker and usually has a very hard time saying no to Jungwon when he's like that (and by very hard, Jungwon means impossible). And Sunghoon, well, Jungwon doesn't even know how to approach that. They've known each other for years and Jungwon has always thought of him as unfairly cool, almost intimidating in how tall and pretty and cold he is at a glance - and then Jungwon had got to know him better and watch him whine about literally every little thing he could and bicker with Jay and scream at pork slices, and well, honestly Jungwon still thinks he's pretty fucking cool but now Jungwon knows that he's also really funny. He's also very much an older brother for Jungwon, calm and comforting in ways that are completely different from Heeseung but just as welcome.</p><p>Nevertheless, Jungwon has no idea how to approach Sunghoon other than a straight confrontation because the dude, unlike Heeseung, will most definitely pick up on subtlety and then shrug it off before Jungwon gets to ask anything. And really a confrontation won't really help either because Sunghoon is so deep-rooted into his insecurity and denial that Jungwon may have to jump into his brain and pull the fear out of his brain and scribble the words<em> "Heeseung Hyung likes you, Pabo"</em> all over the place instead. </p><p>Him and Jay, being the ones to have known Heeseung and Sunghoon the longest, have sat down and tried to map out a plan of action many, many times. So far they've crossed out "look them in a room together", "psychological manipulation to get them to spill their feelings and record them" and "get Sunoo to force them to go on a date but they don't know it's a date" but all of them seamed cheesy and a little worrying (<strong>cough</strong> <em>psychological manipulation to get them to spill their feelings and record them</em> <strong>cough</strong> - it was Jay's idea, Jungwon promises).</p><p>Jungwon honestly has no idea what to do about the whole thing, and that makes him uneasy.</p><p>He's always been the sort of person who knows what he wants to do, knows how to do it, and then, well, does it. Unfortunately, this isn't working out the same way. Part of his brain tells him to stay away, to let his two hyungs figure this shit out on their own and let them navigate, well, <em>whatever </em> this is on his own. But another part of his brain, one that sounds suspiciously like Sunoo, tells him to "look at these two idiots - <em>do you really think they're going to figure this shit out without a little nagging? Maybe that locking them in a room could really work-"</em></p><p>Jungwon tries not to think too much about that voice.</p><p>Either way, Jungwon is not having fun with this situation. In fact he's getting a little annoyed - he just wants his two Hyungs to get together and be cute and go on dates goddamnit, is that really too much to ask? Jungwon doesn't think so - and apparently neither does Jay, because he definitely agrees. It also dawns on Jungwon that his hyung's are getting more obvious by the day, because yes Jungwon and Jay have known for a while now but now Jungwon's pretty sure Sunoo and Jake both know too, and Ni-ki's probably picking up on something or the other too and is just to shy and/or confused to ask about it.</p><p>Despite this, Jungwon still doesn't have a course of action, and neither does Jay, and seemingly neither do Sunoo, Jake or Ni-ki - Jungwon is considering having an emergency meeting to discuss potential methods of finally, finally, getting them together, although it'll probably be hard and a little suspicious for the five of them to talk without Heeseung and/or Sunghoon around as well.</p><p>Jungwon kind of just wishes they'd both stop being stupid and make a fucking move.</p><p>Then again, much easier said than done. </p><p>It's just strange really, Jungwon is used to being in control, and also used to being on top of his shit - it's a defining factor for him, Hidden Ace and all that. So not being able to do something that's so obvious and clear is difficult, to say the least - not to mention, well, Jungwon loves Heeseung and Sunghoon, and wants little more than to see them love each other out in the open (or, well, as open as a same-sex idol relationship can be - to say, not very open at all but at least <em>they'll</em> know and it's better than whatever they've got going now).</p><p>Again, in one Kim Sunoo's words, <em>mess</em>. Big, annoying, jumbled up, confusing, frustrating <em>mess</em>.</p><p>Jungwon is really considering the lock them in a room idea.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>there's only 2 more chapters of this left and maybe and epilogue but asdfghjk</p><p>ALSO PLEASE SCREAM OVER DEBUT TRAILER W ME IN THE COMMENTS I CANNOT BREATHE AND ALSO FEEL THE DEEP DEEP URGE TO WRITE A SHITTY SUPERNATURAL MEDIEVAL AU (I BELIEVE MY EXACT TUMBLR POST READS</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. jay</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Out of all their bandmates, almost all of whom have figured out or are starting to figure out what's going on, Jay's probably the only with complete confirmation from both sides. Heeseung's completely transparent about it, and him running away from Jay every time he brings up the topic only reaffirms that belief. And Sunghoon, well, Sunghoon tells him, because he's his one and only unit and yeah Jake may be coming for his best friend spot but Jay's still holding his own in the grand scheme of Sunghoon's friendships, thank you very much.</p><p>Either way, Jay knows fully that Heeseung is basically completely in love with Sunghoon, and he knows just as fully that Sunghoon loves Heeseung right back. Unfortunately, Jay also knows that both of them are absolutely, completely, ridiculously stupid and that neither of  them are going to do anything about it. </p><p>Common misconception would've said Jay was the dumb one out of the three of them. Common misconception would be wrong, thus the, um, misconception, you know?</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>sorry it's been a while since i updated!! i've been working on a wonki jayhoon one shot which should be out soon and I've been focusing on that :)) </p><p>also sneaked some jaywon in here because of course and why not</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">To be fair, Jay's known for a while.</p><p class="p1">It's been more than 3 years since Jay first saw Heeseung, and It's been about 2 and a half years since he's saw Heeseung and Sunghoon dancing around each other for the first time, so Jay knows both Heeseung <em>and</em> Heeseung relationships with Sunghoon inside out. People don't often give Jay credit for just how perceptive he is, except he doesn't need any of that perceptiveness when it comes to Heeseung and Sunghoon because how much they like each other basically slaps you across the face at even just a glance.</p><p class="p1">It's disgusting.</p><p class="p1">Jay hates them.</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">No, he doesn't.</span>
</p><p class="p1">Out of all their bandmates, almost all of whom have figured out or are starting to figure out what's going on, Jay's probably the only with complete confirmation from both sides. Heeseung's completely transparent about it, and him running away from Jay every time he brings up the topic only reaffirms that belief. And Sunghoon, well, Sunghoon tells him, because he's his <em>one and only unit</em> and yeah Jake may be coming for his best friend spot but Jay's still holding his own in the grand scheme of Sunghoon's friendships, thank you very much.</p><p class="p1">Either way, Jay knows fully that Heeseung is basically completely in love with Sunghoon, and he knows just as fully that Sunghoon loves Heeseung right back. Unfortunately, Jay also knows that both of them are absolutely, completely, ridiculously stupid and that neither of  them are going to do anything about it. Common misconception would've said Jay was the dumb one out of the three of them. Common misconception would be wrong, thus the, um,<em> mis</em>conception, you know?</p><p class="p1">Jungwon helps, because Jungwon knows and isn't a dumbass about it.</p><p class="p1">The two of them stay up together and quietly discuss<em> how fucking stupid </em>Heeseung and Sunghoon are.</p><p class="p1">It's almost therapeutic. </p><p class="p1">Nevertheless, them dancing around each other constantly for more than 2 whole years is genuinely getting frustrated and Jay wants nothing more than to act on Jungwon's idea of locking the two of them in a closet together. Jungwon vetoes it and says no, Jay doesn't get why, it's <em>his</em> idea after all. Besides, they've got literally no other plots or plans to get them together and Jay just wants to stop receiving long, pining rants in his private chat with Sunghoon (he does usually tend to leave him on read, that's usually because Sunghoon texts him from across the room and they're usually texts that read <em>"Jay-ah!!! he's staring at me again i can feel it"</em> followed by a <em>"WHY WON'T HE JUST ASK ME OUT ALREADY</em><span class="s2">☹️</span><em>!!!!"</em> - or something along those lines. </p><p class="p1">Jay usually shoots him a scathing look from across the room and Sunghoon pouts at him and Jay is lucky because he's genuinely the only one here that wouldn't cave at the sight of Sunghoon pouting. The rest of ENHYPEN are weak, Jay quite frankly is not (except for Jungwon maybe, but well, (<em>fuck you Kim Sunoo and you're stupid conspiracy theories, Jay does not have a thing for Jungwon) </em>they're all weak for Jungwon).</p><p class="p1">Anyway, Sunghoon is annoying, Heeseung is weak, and Jay is tired.</p><p class="p1">Unfortunately, Jay is also worried, because this endless saga of stolen glances and voiceless pining cannot be good for either of them and frankly, Jay is a little concerned. Sunghoon, despite being, well, <em>Sunghoon, </em>is terribly insecure and overthinks to a fault and Jay knows that the longer this drags out the more Sunghoon will convince himself that<em> yes, he was right all along and Heeseung has absolutely no feelings for him</em>. That would be wrong - because it doesn't look like Heeseung's gonna get any less dense anytime soon and Jay doesn't know how much constant pining is good for a person.</p><p class="p1">This definitely doesn't seem healthy.</p><p class="p1">So, Jay plans. Or at least he tries his level best to.</p><p class="p1">Unfortunately, well, Jay is completely blank.</p><p class="p1">There truly isn't a single way - at least, that he can think of - for him to push his two friends and bandmates together (aside from, <em>again</em>, the closet idea, but that has, <em>again</em>, been vetoed so it's out) and try as hard as Jay might, he just can't think of anything that would help. He offers advice, which is really the only thing that he can do and because, well, not to be cocky but Jay gives like <em>the best</em> advice.  Unfortunately, Heeseung and Sunghoon are clearly lost causes because while it maybe works a little - Sunghoon at least pays some attention to what he says, mostly it's not very helpful - Heeseung still runs away the second Jay mentions Sunghoon's name. A 25% success rate maybe, that's what Jay would give his advice, if he's generous. </p><p class="p1">All in all, Jay is not having a great time, and if you couldn't already tell, neither are Sunghoon and Heeseung.</p><p class="p1">Jay, as often, <em>aggressively</em> mentioned, has never been in a relationship in his life, so really the fact that <em>he </em>has to figure it out is a little unfair. Well, like, he doesn't <em>have</em> to be the one to do it or anything, it's not like he's been backed into a corner by threats of the <em>'if-you-don't-get-them-together-you-will-die'</em> variety, but Jay has set a goal and a precedent for himself and Jay has never been one to back down from one of those.</p><p class="p1">Literally, like, Jay doesn't think he could even if he tried. </p><p class="p1">It's annoying really, the fact that a relationship that isn't even his own is acting as the bane of his existence, really he just wants to walk up to Heeseung, say 'HE LIKES YOU TO FUCKFACE' and then follow through on the Jungwon locking them in a closet plan. However, as previously mentioned that will - unfortunately, because it'd be damn funny if it did - not be happening. </p><p class="p1">"The thing is I know they're not idiots," Jay finds himself telling Jungwon in hushed whispers. They're on practice break right now, and Jay is huddled next to the younger member in one corner of the practice room, the both of them watching Heeseung help Sunghoon perfect a move together with a look that Jay doesn't want to look too much into for fear of throwing up, "like, they both did considerably better than me in school, how could they not figure out they like each other? Like? They've gotta know at this point!"</p><p class="p1">Jungwon just shakes his head, lips in a pout  and eyebrows clenched in a way that really only Jungwon can make loo cute (do NOT quotes Jay on that). "I have two words for you, hyung," Jungwon says wisely, "insecurity and denial."</p><p class="p1">"That's three words, Wonie."</p><p class="p1">"The "and" obviously doesn't count!"</p><p class="p1">Jay's pretty sure it counted. He says as much.</p><p class="p1">"I'm pretty sure it counts, Wonie."</p><p class="p1">"Don't <em>'Wonie'</em> me when you're being stupid and annoying."</p><p class="p1">"That's Stupid and Annoying <em>Hyung,</em> to you."</p><p class="p1">"<em>That doesn't even make sense!</em>"</p><p class="p1">So yeah, Heeseung and Sunghoon, Sunghoon and Heeseung, Milk and Carrot (Jay doesn't know how that one started or why they decided to roll with it but, well, sure), Bane of Jay's Existence, 2 Genuinely Oblivious Motherfuckers, Tweedledum and Tweedle-fucking-dumber, really Jay could go on, are insufferable and Jay, for one, is suffering because of them. Unfortunately, Jay has no idea how to stop this suffering aside from maybe murdering Heeseung and Sunghoon and/or himself. Jungwon says Jay is dramatic. Jungwon is wrong. </p><p class="p2">Honestly the number of late nights he's spent thinking about the two of them is getting ridiculous. It started from <em>"oh no, I'm going to have to third wheel so much now,"</em> and eventually progressed into<em> "god, I wish I was third wheeling right now"</em> when Jay realized that neither of them were going to make any moves towards a relationship any time soon and without a fuckton of nudging.</p><p class="p2">Even nudging will only get them so far when Sunghoon is so deeply rooted in denial and insecurity that he can see Heeseung's feelings clear as day and still denies that they're there, and Heeseung is just, well, Heeseung, and runs away any time Jay even tries to nudge. </p><p class="p2">So, Jay will do what he always does, sit down, suffer, and hope that Sunghoon and Heeseung pull their fucking heads out of their asses and just tell each other they’re in love.</p><p class="p2">Fuck, he's going to have a hard fucking time, isn't he?</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>there's only one more chapter of this fic and maybe an epilogue left!! it's been a ride my guys :'))</p><p>ALSO WANNA SAY THANK YOU FOR THE 100 KUDOS!!! UR COMMENTS ALWAYS MAKE ME SO HAPPY AND ENCOURAGE ME TO WRITE MORE SO JUST ASDFGHJK THANK YOU!!!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. ni-ki</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ni-ki investigates, figures some stuff out, and makes a list.</p><p>This is what he has so far.</p><p>1. There is something going on between Heeseung Hyung and Sunghon Hyung.</p><p>2. Everyone knows except Ni-ki.</p><p>3. Everyone knows except Ni-ki - and also Sunghoon and Heeseung Hyung.</p><p>This last realisation takes longer than the rest, either way, his hyung's are as clueless as he is, because everyone else is shooting each other looks, but they're not shooting anyone anything and no one is shooting them anything either and no one is shooting Ni-ki anything too and that's not okay and Ni-ki just wants to know what the fuck is going on. </p><p>Calm, Ni-ki, calm.</p><p>What would Micheal Jackson do?</p><p>Okay maybe not that, fuck, so, well, what would Heeseung Hyung do?</p><p>Well, all Ni-ki has been seeing Heeseung Hyung do the past few weeks (aside from sing and dance and make them laugh and all that normal stuff), is stare at Sunghoon Hyung, and then look away so quickly that Ni-ki is scared he may break his neck at any second. And, well, Ni-ki isn't sure that's the best way to deal with all of this - again, not that Ni-ki knows what all of this is. Sad Face Emoji, Grumpy Face Emoji, Red Grumpy Face Emoji.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>omg last chapter!!! may or may not do an epilogue but we will see!!!!!!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Something is going on, Ni-ki can feel it. Can see it. Can hear it.</p><p>Just isn't being told what it fucking is.</p><p>He know's he's young and what not but like, he's only a year and a few months younger than Jungwon and <em>he </em>seams to know everything that's going on. Ni-ki isn't dumb either so even if they don't tell him (hmph) he can piece things together. Like, okay, he lived alone for almost an entire year when he was <em>thirteen, </em>he's not an idiot. And quite frankly, since everyone knows, Ni-ki figures he should know too! It's only fair! Democracy! Equality and eat the rich and all that jazz!</p><p>Okay maybe Ni-ki's been paying a little too much attention to Jungwon's anti-capitalist rants. </p><p>Look, it's just that Ni-ki hates being out of the loop. Call him an angsty teenager (he's not, he promises,<em> shut up Jay, you don't know anything</em>), but Ni-ki  feels like he has a right to know - especially if everyone else does. Even Sunoo won't tell him what's going on and that's after Ni-ki even tells the older boy his hypothesis. Betrayal. That's what it is. Complete and utter betrayal and Ni-ki would've expected it from Jungwon - but Sunoo? His dear sweet Sunoo Hyung? Cancelled. </p><p>So, Ni-ki investigates, figures some stuff out, and makes a list.</p><p>This is what he has so far.</p><p>
  <strong>1. There is something going on between Heeseung Hyung and Sunghon Hyung. </strong>
</p><p>What it is Ni-ki really couldn't tell, he couldn't even tell you if it was good or bad, but it was something and Ni-ki didn't like not knowing what it was. Ni-ki's not exactly an observant person, but he picks up on things pretty instantly when he sets his mind to picking them up (hello? Learns entire choreographies in 10 minutes, thank you very much). At first Ni-ki had thought they were fighting, Heeseung seams to jump from Staring intensely at Sunghoon to pulling his eyes away to eventually getting sucked back in and Sunghoon just glances over at the oldest member more times than is to be expected. Still, Ni-ki couldn't tell you what those glances mean.</p><p>
  <strong>2. Everyone knows except Ni-ki.</strong>
</p><p>This is far far worse that point 1, but Ni-ki knows this for absolute sure. Jungwon and Jay always exchange glances that range from amused to worried to annoyed any time Sunghoon and Heeseung are so much as in the same room. Sunoo sometimes stares at the two them more intensely than they stare at each other, eyes narrowed into slits, a finger on his chin, as if he's deep in thought. Jake just looks long suffering, staring at Heeseung and Sunghoon with eyes that Ni-ki can't fully decipher, but in his own experiences with Jake usually follow sentences like <em>Dammit Ni-ki I told you not to mix colours when you do the laundry</em> and <em>Ni-ki why are you're joggers from friday still on the floor, it's been almost a week, I cannot live like this.</em></p><p>
  <strong>3. Everyone knows except Ni-ki - and also Sunghoon and Heeseung Hyung. </strong>
</p><p>This realisation takes longer than the rest - Ni-ki really only confirms it after Sunoo tells them that they're not fighting and that something else is going instead (even though Sunoo won't tell him what the something else is, asshole - <em>"oh, Ni-ki, we'll tell you one day when you're old enough!" Shut up Sunoo, you're 2 years older!</em>) Either way, his hyung's are as clueless as he is, because everyone else is shooting each other looks, but they're not shooting anyone anything and no one is shooting them anything either and no one is shooting Ni-ki anything too and that's not okay and <em>Ni-ki just wants to know what the fuck is going on</em>. </p><p>Calm, Ni-ki, calm.</p><p>What would Micheal Jackson do?</p><p>Okay maybe that's not the best question to ask here, fuck, so, well, what would Heeseung Hyung do?</p><p>Oh Heeseung Hyung, good old reliable Heeseung Hyung who always knows what to do and how to do it! Maybe whatever is happening right now involves him but Ni-ki is sure that Heeseung Hyung know's what to do about it! Even if he's not sure what <em>it </em>is! He's the ace for a reason! Yeah, that's right Ni-ki, <em>think like Heeseung Hyung.</em></p><p>Well, all Ni-ki has been seeing Heeseung Hyung do the past few weeks (aside from sing and dance and make them laugh and all that normal stuff), is stare at Sunghoon Hyung, and then look away so quickly that Ni-ki is scared he may break his neck at any second. And, well, Ni-ki isn't sure <em>that's </em>the best way to deal with all of this - again, not that Ni-ki knows what all of this is<em>. Sad Face Emoji, Grumpy Face Emoji, Red Grumpy Face Emoji.</em></p><p>
  <strong>4. Everything sucks and Ni-ki just wants to know what's going on aaaaaaljgkgsljkgjl.</strong>
</p><p>The rest of the members aren't being particularly secretive anymore either. In the beginning the glances being exchanged were more amused and secretive, now they just look tired and exasperated. Jay especially, who Ni-ki notices looks like he's going to yell out of frustration at any moment <em>even more</em> than he normally does. Sunoo and Jungwon's eyes are both piercing, sharp and catlike digging into their hyungs.</p><p>The newly appointed leader looks particularly contemplative, as if his head is brewing with plots and ideas that Ni-ki, once a-fucking-gain, is not privy too. Sunoo just looks tired, the "slytherin" in him jumping out at every glance. Jake is the nicest about it, which is expected because Jake just the nicest out of their little group, shooting everyone exasperated but hopeful smiles and patting Jay on the back when the frustrated groans get too loud. </p><p>Sunghoon Hyung is oblivious to it all, Sunoo notes. Usually preoccupied with laughing and distracting himself with their members (more often than not at their expense because Sunghoon is like that) and actively avoiding Jay and Jake's eyes. Heeseung is fully aware, however, catching their eyes, glaring, and then looking away face a shade of red that Ni-ki can't quite believe is healthy. He's more fidgety than usual too, picking at the sleeves of his sweater and the loose threads from one of his 536 of beanies (which is not an exaggeration at all, really, Ni-ki counted them, he can vouch for it) - and, while Ni-ki isn't nearly as oblivious as Sunghoon, he's not doing much better than Heeseung is.</p><p>
  <em>("Come on, Hyung!" Ni-ki whisperes one night, "Just tell me what's going on."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"It's not my thing to say, Ni-ki" Sunoo says from where they're lied down next to each other on Sunoo's bed.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Well then who's thing is it to say, then?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You know that already - you asked me about it like 2 days ago."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Then I know like half of it already - just tell me the rest! Come on! Please!"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Look, it's not my thing - no, Ni-ki, no puppy dog eyes, they don't work on me and you know them!"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>That's right, they don't, Sunoo says it's because the only thing that can blind him is his own cuteness, and nothing quite matches up to that. Ni-ki hates him. <strike>No he doesn't</strike>. Extra Big Frown Sad Face Emoji, Sad Face With Single Tear Emoji.)</em>
</p><p>
  <em>(He tries again with Jungwon a couple days later which is even more unhelpful because Jungwon just blinks at him, smiles, pretends to zip his lips and then moves on to talk about choreography completely ignoring NI-ki. He doesn't try the puppy eyes this time. They won't work on Jungwon. Cold Hearted Fucker that he is. Ni-ki thought they were friends, guess he's wrong. Angry Face With Censored Curse Words Emoji, <em>Grumpy Face With Smoke Coming Out Of The Nostrils Emoji.</em>)</em>
</p><p>Regardless of his unhelpful Hyung's, Ni-ki's invested in this story, whatever it is because <em>once again Ni-ki doesn't know and he is mad about it.</em> However, if things go according to plan Ni-ki will in fact know soon. Unfortunately, however, the plan is mostly non existent. Well, that's a lie, it's completely non-existent - he could try the puppy eyes on Jake maybe, the puppy eyes <em>always </em>work on Jake.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>it's been a ride my dudes!!!! THIS IS ALSO THE FIRST CHAPTERED FIC I'VE FINISHED SO THERE'S ALSO THAT!!! Thank you to everyone who's been reading and commenting and giving me support throughout this fic, im so thankful for all you asdfghj HAVE A GOOD DAY HAPPY 12 DAYS TILL EN- DEBUTATION!!!</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>this the shortest thing I've written ever, but I just wanted to explore my style a bit and I love Park Sunghoon so I felt like this would be a good outlet for it asdfghjk if people like it I may turn it into a fic - after I finish off midnight rendezvous - but as things stand this is it!!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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